In Time, We'll Know

The intensity of the heat yesterday caused me intense headache that I slept nearly 6 in the evening. Waking up today, the pain has not subsided yet. I was still holding on with the pain in the office not until I found out something. The emotions maybe more intense than what my physique is feeling coz I can no longer feel the bang in my head but the bang in my heart.

I have no right to neither get mad nor blame anyone for that matter. I do not even know how I feel at this moment. Maybe there are just few things that we cannot expect everyone to tell us. As we said, there are reasons for such to happen. In time, we will know. We just have to wait. Wait for someone to open up and tell us everything. And here we stay, waiting…

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Why Am I So Distracted?

And the deliberation started and ended tonight...

I thought after confessions of truth everything will just pass as if nothing happened. "Why am i so distracted?", I asked myself while playing a game in my phone. I got up and opened my pc and started talking to myself.

Sleeping beside the person I hardly knew at all is despicable. Is it too harsh? Okay I say, uncomfortable. Why such feeling? Is it jealousy or is it just a mere feeling of being betrayed by someone close to you? I was feeling fine after all the laughters and serious talk lately but when everybody else left, I felt everything was serious and I did not know how to place myself in the situation. More with the people around me who are mostly concerned. I was stuck. Words were trapped in my mind and they could not escape my mouth. How will I bring back again those times when everything was just normal. Yet I could not. And now I do not know how my loved ones took hold of the situation. I know they were just trying to hide the pain and frustrations. I can feel their anguish and dismay. I wish I could comfort them but I found no betters words or actions to make them feel better...

But then... it was still not the end. Everything was just a beginning.

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Trust and Honesty

TRUST and HONESTY. Do these two words go hand in hand? Why do we find it hard to be honest to someone close and dear to us? Are we afraid they get hurt or are we just afraid they won’t accept us after finding the truth?

They always say the truth will set you free but when will someone got the courage to set himself free? Bearing a sensitive issue is very difficult and heart-sobbing especially if it is kept alone. It is a great burden. I know. Yet, people chose to succumb themselves to these feelings than risk and confess what is truly in their hearts.

I wanted to tell him I am here. That I can be his confidant. That whatever it is that pains him I can be his comfort. Yet, the wall he built is too high to climb and too sturdy to break. “Let time and nature destroy it”, I told myself, hoping that it won’t be too late before everything else falls apart.

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